my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
