Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Randomize
