We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
