Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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