Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
When did angry sex become our thing?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
