just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Man, jail baloney is awful.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
