It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
All the doctor said was why
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
