I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
