Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I booty called her while she was in labor.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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