Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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