Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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