so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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