we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize