His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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