didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Randomize
