Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
