They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
