all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
