YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
