he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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