Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
