mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
