i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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