If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
