She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
