He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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