Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
