we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
