I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
