brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
