I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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