So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
It's shark week go big or go home
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize