At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize
