i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
