So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
