i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
