you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
