He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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