Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just google imaged poop.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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