i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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