I wanna bring you to show and tell
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
