OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
