I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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