How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize