she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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