Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
