Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
