Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Thank you for not boning my boss.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
