Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize