if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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