Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
